What if you want something so much that you push it away? Do not want for not. What the Fuck does that even mean? I want it badly. And I will do what it takes to get it. Plain and simple. Oh yes, it will be mine.
Friday, March 29, 2013
My alarm goes off at 7am pretty much every morning.
It starts off with a sniffle near my head and slowly progresses to a kind of whimpered exhale.
I am awake, but I may or may not acknowledge.
If I don't pay proper or satisfactory recognition, suddenly there is a jump and a thump and I am joined in bed by a 40 lb tripod Jesus and either Scorpion or Lobster.
Wake up! They say. We have to pee and its time to start your day!
(Scorpion can't actually relieve himself, but he partakes in the ambush anyway)
Buhhhhhh, yes, yes, its dawn. A new day. I stretch, he streches, we all stretch.
I yawn. He yawns. I contemplate going back to sleep. He army-crawls a bit closer to my head and rolls around a bit so his body weight and positioning leaves me no drift-back-to-sleep room.
Damn. I'm awake. His soft fur and warm body make me smile. He knows he's won. He pounces on Scorpion and gives an excited snort of triumph, throwing his head back. Is he laughing at me?
Oh-kay-... The words have barely left my mouth and he is leaping off the bed and scrambling for the back door.
Hurry, hurry, he squeals. There might be a squirrel in my yard and I'm going to bark really loudly at it! His giddy grin from across the room forces an audible laugh from my belly.
I throw the covers back, giving them a little shake to expell any residing dog hairs. (He's really not allowed on the bed)
Another day has begun with Jesus warming my heart. I am grateful for his daily wake up mission. He is a special and very loved dog.
Easter is Sunday and I cannot help wonder how my morning alarm and the resurrection of Christ can be twisted into some funny dharma for my class on Sunday. I'll have to play with that.
Maybe I will make Jesus an Easter basket...
Friday, March 22, 2013
Spring is here... A time of new beginnings...
So I make my magick egg :)
I dye it blue for Peace and Serenity, and fill it with a citrine crystal, cinnamon chips, and bay leaves for Prosperity and Healing. I seal it with red wax for Love. It lays on my alter, a symbol of birth, life, creation and creativity, of new beginnings.
Darkness hovers. The early dawn sends invitation: it is time. We are ready to begin. As I strike my sceptre into the ground, a bright sparkling golden light shoots from the bottom of my staff into the ground, bringing fertility to the earth and sprouting new life beneath me. The top of my wooden staff radiates a beautiful glittering aura, encircling myself and all those near and dear to me. I gently arch my back, tilt my head, and gaze up to the heavens in gratitude; bending over, I scoop up a handful of soil, placing one hand over the other, cupping the cool moist earth, giving my blessings for the coming season. As the soil falls back to earth between my fingertips, I Rise, empowered by the Divine Light to embark on this new adventure. The fire of light surrounding me pulsates with each breathe, swirling and thickening as it reaches the corners of me.
I breathe deeply. And breathe again. This place, this now, this life, is perfect. Complete. There is nothing more that I require. My feet grounded, my sex satisfied, my belly filled, my heart open, my breathe quality; my vision is clear. This is the beginning.
And so I begin . . .
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
She floats above me in the distance,
her pink chiffon dress fluttering in the winds of time.
She smiles warmly,
I smile back, not knowing but trusting.
Who she is does not matter,
her story must be heard.
I am surrounded by pastel sunrise colors and filled with vibrational joy,
her memories implanted in mine as we share the laughter of a joke told long ago.
I don't want this to end.
But I feel my world pulling me back,
my life gently tugging on the rope to let me know its time to return to my dreams, my head, my bed.
I steal one last grateful gaze at her essence, her story told, her life affirmed.
She fades as the ceiling comes back in to focus. And then she is gone.
But her vibrations remain. Etched into my cells fast and forever.
Floating pink chiffon.